Buffalo Wild Wings currently has a ” Blazin’ Wing Challenge ” and if you eat 12 wings in under 6 minutes you get a shirt and your picture on the wall. I though it would be a good idea for my husband to give this a try. He HATES spicy food and I though it would be funny. But guess what? God don’t like ugly and he ain’t too fond of pretty. He struck me down, okay!? Here’s how I died and came back to life. Also catch the video that inspired me below:
Hope you enjoyed the video, she was hilarious but let me tell you. This video doesn’t even do the pain justice.
First of all I should have known better, the sauce was clumpy and extremely red. I don’t have a picture of my actual wings but I’ll tell you why later. I smelled them, they seemed harmless enough, I rubbed my finger against one and my throat was lightly scorched but nothing major. So, it comes time for my husband to take his first bite and that’s all he does! He takes on bite, starts coughing like he was smoking purp and runs to the kitchen sink. Spitting his bit out along the way. But I was expecting this.This is the norm for him. He doesn’t use hot sauce. He buys stuffed jalapeños, only eats the cheese and still thinks it’s too spicy.
I’m thinking I don’t want to waste perfectly good food and I can handle it. That was a lie, I took one bite, drenched it in ranch ( which is why I don’t have a good pic) and ate two more. After each bite I had to leave the room, come back, drench another side in ranch and take another bite. After about 3 trips my lips were on fire, my throat was burning and water was not doing the job! Water made it worse!
These things are so ridiculously hot, I swear the devil put a little spit in it. Buffalo Wild Wings is malicious for making these things. They don’t love you and God doesn’t love them. They certainly made a deal with the devil for hell sauce. My ears were burning, my nose was running and I was sticking my lips under the faucet just to keep them cool. Even hot food created a heat in my mouth I wasn’t ready for. It brought the flames back alive! By the time my lips stopped burning my insides felt like a volcano was erupting. I knew it was over for me. I felt violated and my whole body was shaking. There’s no way any human can enjoy these. If you try them understand it is strictly for bragging rights. It’s going to burn, there’s nothing you can. Just don’t do it! This is every hateful thing you’ve ever thought or done, put in the form of a sauce. All I wanted to do was expel that demon food from my body.
I’m scarred, I won’t be eating anything else spicy anytime soon. Just thinking about it is making my lip burn.
Do you think you could hang?